I spent the bulk of 2014 & 2015 dedicated to figuring out my personal style. I'd simply had enough of trying to dress the way people wanted me to dress. People wanted to see me in button ups and ties, which felt no different to me than my mom wanting to see me in a dress. Both options felt weird. I've never felt comfortable in a suit and I've never felt comfortable in a gown. I did not like looking "dapper" or "pretty" or "dressed up" or "sexy." The only way I liked looking was "cool."
I was also overwhelmed by the pure amount of shit I had in my closet/drawers. After doing laundry, it was like Tetris trying to get all of the t-shirts to fit in one drawer. You know that age old joke we all tell about wearing the same 5 outfits over and over, but having a billion clothes? That was definitely me. So, I started getting rid of things. The first step was tossing everything I knew for a fact I hated wearing. If I looked through my closet and knew I was only keeping something because I "might have to" wear it, I threw it out. It was actually pretty nerve-wracking because sometimes I have to attend events where I need to dress up, but I just was DONE feeling uncomfortable. Another plus was that my girlfriend and I (co-founder, Julia Nunes) sold so much stuff to stores like Buffalo Exchange and Crossroads, that we had about $300 to spend on finding clothes that we adore. If you're more into watching videos, I've posted mine below, but I'm also going to list the steps I went through to finally get a wardrobe I really, truly, love.
First - let it be known that having someone help you out makes this whole process super fun. Our friend, Jillian, has offered to come over and get rid of everything she thinks (a) doesn't look good on you, (b) isn't your style, or (c) doesn't fit you well, and she hides it all. If you can remember the item, you get to have it back, and that's it. At the end, you get to look through everything and keep five things. If you're brave, try that! OOORR try this:
Make three piles
- Sell/Trade - Clothes that are in good condition, have a dope brand name, or would look awesome on someone else. You can find local stores (like Buffalo Exchange, Crossroads Trading Company, or Uptown Cheapskate) where you can bring those clothes in and receive cash or store credit. Put that money toward buying new clothes that will make you feel amazing.
- Donate - Clothes that won't necessarily sell, but would be really helpful for someone in need. Most stores won't buy used socks or shoes that look super scuffed, but there are shelters for victims of domestic abuse, homelessness, etc., that could benefit greatly from the things you no longer need/want.
- Throw out - No one needs your old holey panties (including you.)
Get rid of all the clothes you have only because you "might have to" wear them for something. If you had to go to an event tomorrow, would you really want to wear that outfit? If the answer is 'no,' get rid of it. OR if it's a sweatshirt you're only keeping because your aunt gave it to you and you "might have to" wear it next time she comes over, just to prove you kept it?? Get rid of it. Start dressing for you. So much of our confidence comes from feeling, looking, and presenting the way that feels best. It's time to stop wearing stupid things just because we don't want to hurt other people's feelings.
Go through your clothes one category at a time. You can even do this slowly over a weekend, week, or month. Who cares, it's your life! It's easier to look at everything by category. If you have 20 pairs of pants right now, pick up each one, hold it up and say, "Do I like this?" If your answer is, "NOPE," "naaah," "ugh," or "eh," throw it in a pile. Don't even fool with stuff that you don't like. The goal is to own only the stuff you really love. Do your bottoms, then your tops, then your one-pieces (jumpers/dresses/overalls/whatever), then your t-shirts, sleepwear, work out clothes, shoes, socks, bras, underwear, etc., etc.
Cut down on the amount of clothing you're keeping around for memories. Don't get me wrong, I have my 4th grade basketball shirt that I only wear to bed, probably once every 5 months. I also have a fake college T-shirt that says "Zettler College," named after my friend, made as a joke. Again, I only wear that to bed once every 5 months. It's totally great to have a few things for sentimental reasons, I'm not a monster! I love memories! However, I do think that sometimes we hang on to too many things for too long. Pick 2 or 3 REALLY GOOD memory items and make a digital collage of the rest. If you don't wear it and the only time you see it is when you're moving into a new place and you HAVE to empty your drawers... it's time to let it go.
Before buckling down to do this, open your closet and your drawers and take notice of how you feel. When I started, I was looking at a bunch of clothes I hated and by the time I found an outfit I wanted to wear, I had spent all morning sifting through clothes that made me uncomfortable. The goal here is to have a closet full of clothes you love. You want to be able to accidentally wake up late and be able to just grab something, run out the door, and feel incredible. Looking at all your clothes and loving what you see will drastically improve the way you feel every time you get dressed. You deserve to feel great every single day.